Mr NRI don’t spend for “Keeping up with the Joneses”

Last week while having dinner with some close friends, conversing and discussing on various topics I stumbled upon a point which I thought I should share with you all.

Actually, my family and I were invited over dinner to a friend’s place after a very long time. We’ve been friends for quite some time now and have seen and known him closely. I was glad to see his warmth and hospitality and also how well he had maintained his life and status.

But amidst all that glitz and sparkle I could sense something else.

When I spoke to him at length he confessed that he really had to do all this to keep up appearances.

That was a moment I could actually relate to the phrase, don’t spend to keep up with the Joneses.

Let me explain the phrase “keeping up with the Joneses.”

The idiom comes from the Joneses, who represented:

• Affluence and prosperity.
• A grand lifestyle.
• Big mansions.
• High social connections and relations.

Keeping up with the Joneses is an idiom used in many parts of the world to describe comparing yourself to your neighbour as a benchmark for wealth, status, or the accumulation of material goods.

Check: How Financial Planning for NRIs is different

The situation is more complex for NRIs

Failing to “keep up with the Joneses” is often perceived, wrongly, as a sign of socio-economic or cultural inferiority. This pressure to keep up appearances can push NRIs toward:

• Overspending.
• Buying and collecting things that serve no real use.
• Seeking validation from people, society, and neighbours.
• Losing their own peace of mind and happiness.

You may also become envious, and in trying to compete with your neighbours, you may lose your confidence and happiness, and stay in a constant state of stress. Certain decisions made under this pressure can land you in a deep sea of debt and quietly sugar-coated EMI expenses.

This isn’t a case against spending or buying things you genuinely want. It’s simply a reminder: don’t spend just to keep up with the Joneses.

Most NRIs have real means and resources, but spending can become irresistible, especially when the people around you seem to value adding material things more than adding value to life.

Outside influences are constantly pouring in, and we often end up obeying their unspoken rules and accepting their verdicts. Here’s how this extravagant spending happens without us fully realising its repercussions.

Read: Easy steps for NRI Retirement Planning

Let us together rethink our basic spending habits and expenditures

The quality of your spending determines the kind of life you lead now, and the life you’ll have in future.

The points below may look basic, but your allocation across each of these baskets will shape your future.

Your basic spending typically falls into these buckets:

• Buying items of basic needs and utilities
  • Grocery items.
  • Mobile bills.
  • Rent.
  • Medical treatments.
• Time with your family and relationships.
  • Vacations.
• Investing in your future.
  • Insurance and investments.
  • Financial planning.
  • Procurement of property.
  • Retirement schemes.
• Self-improvement.
  • Yoga and gym.
  • Dance and music.
  • Learning musical instruments.
  • Extracurricular activities.
• Keeping up appearances.
  • Throwing parties.
  • Club memberships.
  • Buying cars.
  • Branded clothes and accessories.

As the saying goes: before you buy, ask why.

A few points NRIs should keep in mind

Your need vs your want. It’s worth pausing to ask whether what you’ve decided to buy is genuinely needed, or whether it’s simply going to be another addition to the clutter in your house. Impulsive shopping often leads to collecting things you never actually use.

For example, in today’s fast-moving digital world, our smartphone cameras are good enough for most everyday photography, even if they can’t fully replace a professional camera. Someone who enjoys photography as a hobby can often settle for a decent phone rather than paying a premium for a DSLR they’ll rarely use to its full potential.

You’ve probably seen the movie “Confessions of a Shopaholic,” where ideas like “shop till you drop” and “when I shop the world gets better” are shown in a very different light once the debt catches up with the protagonist.

The protagonist’s indulgence in shopping drowns her in debt. Fortune eventually favours her and she becomes successful, largely by luck. Most of us should not count on that same luck.

Your spending philosophy. You’ve probably heard the term YOLO, “you only live once,” alongside the idea that youth only comes once. These are two ideas that quietly guide a lot of spending decisions, especially among younger people.

There is nothing inherently wrong with believing in living life one day at a time, and plenty of finance bloggers and creators, including us, advocate some version of this. But it’s worth remembering that nothing is forever, and this applies to youth as much as anything else.

You have every right to buy what you want, but it’s worth learning the value of a nest egg early. Crises and emergencies are inevitable and rarely announce themselves in advance. The only thing that reliably helps at that moment is money you’ve already set aside. This is why the habit of saving matters, and why it’s worth teaching to the next generation too.

Peer pressure and spending. The same social dynamics that shape careers also shape spending. Younger people are especially impressionable, and easily influenced by their social circle into treating spending as the most exciting activity available, whether that’s the latest phone, gadget, or gaming console.

NRIs whose children grow up in countries where young people become financially independent early sometimes spend most of what they earn on things of limited lasting value. It creates a sense of contentment that can quietly become a habit, without anyone fully registering that overspending now can have real consequences later.

“Too many people are buying things they can’t afford, with money that they don’t have, to impress people that they don’t like.” Will Smith

Your feel-good factor, the real driving force. In many cases, spending itself gives people a genuine high. We may spend partly to signal our own economic stability to the society around us, much like the Joneses we’re quietly comparing ourselves to.

Spending doesn’t just act as a small emotional lift; for some, it becomes tied to their emotional well-being. Spending, however frivolous it might look from the outside, can temporarily fill a sense of emptiness or sadness. It can also boost self-esteem and offer a kind of borrowed confidence, curbing the craving for recognition that drives us to compete with our own version of the Joneses.

But as the saying goes, a stitch in time saves nine. If we can be frugal, sensible, and resist these temptations, we give ourselves and our families a genuinely happier life to look forward to.

Frugal, thoughtful living isn’t really a matter of personality. It’s a matter of wisdom and discretion.

Spending is important, and so is getting the right professional guidance, since it gives a person a genuine sense of security, support, and emotional well-being. With the right suggestions from a professional, you can live fully in the present while staying genuinely prepared for the future.

We’ll close with words from Benjamin Franklin:

“Beware of little expenses; a small leak will sink a great ship.”

We’d love to hear your own experience with this in the comment section.